Thursday, December 27, 2012

Fear not, we are equals

Source: Internet

 As a girl I’m advised not to go out late nights, to wear ‘appropriate clothes’, to arm myself with chili powder and pepper sprays, to be extra vigilant about who is walking behind me and on and on and on.

I ask—“But why me?”

When mothers can advise this to their daughter, why can’t they advise their sons about respecting a woman and her modesty, about treating them as equals and not as sex objects.

When you lecture this to your daughters, you are actually making them weak, making them feel guilty of who they are, creating fear in them and snatching away their basic right to live freely, the right to safety and the right of belongingness.

This country belongs to women as much as it belongs to men. Its roads, trains, cabs, nightlife, beaches, hotels, restaurants, movie theatres --- everything equally belongs to them. We do not need to fear to use any of them, at any time of the day or night or with anyone.

Whenever I come home late from office or outside, all my mother worried about was my health. But one brutal rape shakes the entire country and boom ---- all mothers are worried about their daughter’s safety.

Suddenly counseling begins, advises flow from every person you know, defense techniques like martial arts are encouraged to be mastered --- all this for a ‘just-in-case’ situation.

I don’t wish to learn survival techniques. I don’t wish to live in a society in survival and fear. I refuse to accept a gender biased crisis.

I am this country’s daughter and I have every right to live freely as every other citizen. I will not fear and succumb to maniacs.

If anything has to change, then it should be the society and the mindset of people living in this society. If you blame your actions for women and their ‘inappropriate clothes’, then what explanation do you have for raping a 3 year old kid?

Men, you need to change your attitude and accept women for the way they are. Hold yourself liable for actions you take on account of your own filth.

Change now, for your own mothers, sisters and daughters, for we are not feared of you and we shall never be.


  1. Phenomenally said dear.. Hope it brings about a Change !! The Society may accept Laws which may be Stringent, but what matters most is how the Society molds its Conscience and Attitude !!!

    Wish U all the Best !!

  2. i totally agree.... i hav heard (educated!!) guys blame girls for eve teasing...they advice us to dress properly, not to stay back late or always be accompanied by someone we can trust....wen will they realize that all they need to do is stop bothering us so that we can live freely and safely...

  3. I absolutely agree with you as far as the rights are concerned. Not just this country, anywhere on the earth women should be treated with respect and dignity. But you can not take the animalistic instincts completely out of male mindset. That is why all the laws and the value systems in societies are not enough to protect women from this brutality. This assertion is evidenced from your own question that why a three year old should fall victim to rape. Everyone knows that stealing is legally and ethically wrong. Yet, we lock our homes before we leave. Similarly, women should be cautious about their surroundings when they are out late and by themselves. Because all it takes is one mother(if we want to blame her) who failed to instill in her son that women are not to be treated like a piece of meat. I mentioned only mother here because you said that mothers should not lecture only their daughters but also teach their sons. But as a man I believe that father has a duty too to teach his son not only by telling but also by an example. Most boys will treat women in their adult life as they saw their mothers being treated by their fathers. I apologize for being blunt but a rapist will rape if the "opportunity" presented itself. Unfortunately, sometimes he will seek one out too. So practice your freedom but if some precaution can prevent this tragedy please be careful.

    1. Agree with your thoughts!
      Thanks for reading!

  4. Hey keep posting such good and meaningful articles.